Mr. Show Off

The last few pick-ups at school, Will's teacher says, "Will had such a good day today!"

It's almost as if his little ears perk at that moment, he hears it from way out on the playground, and he thinks, "Oh really? Well I'll show them!"

Today, he took his squirt gun and threw it at poor little Evie's head.

Last week, he pushed Jonas over in the red car--car and all.

The week before, he just ran around and hit all of his friends in the face.

And it was with a sad realization today that I accepted the teacher's explanation that he is showing off. Greg and I were (and still are!) such people pleasers. We would put on our best manners to show off: clear tables, help pick up toys, give hugs.

But Will hits his friends.

With tears I fear: Is my kid a bully?

Now yes, he's two-almost-three. And I think he knows better, as hitting doesn't fly in our house. Greg and I aren't exactly violent people, and we explain that Mr. Incredible only hits the bad guy because the bad guy hurts people.

So what gives?

I was retelling my bully boy fears to a friend who said, "At least you don't have the kid who sits there and lets other kids steal his toys."

In my mind, wouldn't that be better?

I worry about my kid not having friends because he's weird, not because he's mean.

Ten years from now, will my son be the one the teachers look at when talking about what a bully is?

After a time out from the teacher, and helping Evie get an ice pack for her forehead, I put Will in the car, informed him there would be no playing outside, and no iPhone games--the two things he lives for--because of his actions. "If you hit your friends, then you don't get to do the things you like."

"Do you understand?" I asked.

He looked at me, reached for my face, and planted a kiss.

No, he doesn't understand--not completely anyway. Eventually he will get his emotions in check. Eventually he will use his words and not his actions. Eventually this mom will stop worrying about what will happen in the future and start rectifying the present.

And until then, we will work on our show off techniques.